Netflixing is the new black

Ananya Zachariah

You can tell a lot about people by the shows they binge-watch. If you’re an avid Sherlock fan, you’re most likely an enthusiastic consumer of tea (or so you say) and do crossword puzzles in ink. If you enjoy Gossip Girl, you probably know every fashion designer’s name by heart and can’t comprehend why you’re driving to school in a Prius instead of the Mercedes limo you clearly deserve. Are you obsessed with Breaking Bad? You have almost certainly concocted double lives for all of your teachers and are convinced that your English teacher moonlights as a lady of the night, and your Physics teacher as a mafia hit man. If you’re up all night watching The Office, you had better stay at home, hidden from the rest of us, because you’re so behind the times I wouldn’t be surprised if you still wear gauchos and wedged flip-flops.

Netflixing, for those of you late to the universal party, is the act of watching an entire season of a show in one sitting, and is an entirely justifiable excuse for canceling social obligations. Your friends aren’t going anywhere, but How I Met Your Mother might be if the Netflix gods ever decide to heartlessly discard it like they did with Love Actually and Titanic. If you haven’t already boarded the Netflix ship, I’m not sure what you’re waiting for. Frank Underwood is calling out to you in his smooth, Southern drawl, and Sookie St. James will have a delectable chocolate mousse cake waiting for you when you board.

If, however, you’re a faithful patron of the Netflix bistro, and have eaten your way through Orange is the New Black and House of Cards, next on the menu is Gilmore Girls with a side of Friends. Gilmore Girls is the touching comedy-drama following single mother, Lorelai Gilmore, and daughter, Rory, on their escapades, both romantic and occupational. The witty banter and colorful characters find a place in everyone’s heart, no matter the gender. And Friends is one of the most popular and acclaimed sitcoms of all time. Just five episodes will have you saying, “I am SUCH a Chandler,” or “Rachel is my kindred spirit.”

Netflix has something for everyone. Sure, it has its pitfalls. If you’re in a frantic search for something new to watch and take a wrong turn, you could find yourself viewing some seriously bizarre and almost hilariously bad movies (we won’t discuss Birdemic: Shock and Terror or Romeo and Juliet: Sealed With a Kiss). Or you could lose all grasp of the English language besides those four deadly words, “Just one more episode.” Parents will tell you that you’re wasting your time. I urge you to quote Clueless (available on Netflix), and say, “Ugh, as if.”